[Orlando, FL] It was inevitable, really.

After a disastrous season filled with more drama than one of those Spanish-language soap operas that I can’t understand but somehow they still draw me in, the Orlando Magic announced that they have parted ways with both their head coach and their general manager.

Yes, the reign of terror is finally over. GM and President of Basketball Operations Otis Smith is officially gone, having “mutually agreed to part ways” with the organization. I certainly hope Gilbert “Goodfornuthin’” Arenas gives him a taste of the tens of millions Smith gifted him.

What did he get, like $10 million a bucket?

While Smith and Arenas are high-fiving in the champagne room, Orlando basketball fans are left holding a mess of a team and a heap of unresolved issues. Whoever the Magic brings in will have their work cut out for him or her (but we all know it will be a him).

My shortlist: former President Bill Clinton … Jesus Christ … or both. After all, it will take world-class power of persuasion and at least a few miracles to save this ship from sinking.

The other big news today is the firing of Head Coach Stan Van Gundy. Stan Van was actually a good coach, but he has obviously lost his effect on Dwight Howard and at this point, the ball club had no choice but to can him. His style of coaching wears on players, apparently.

“On behalf of the DeVos Family, we sincerely appreciate and thank Otis and Stan for all that they have done on and off the floor for the Orlando Magic,” said Orlando Magic Chief Executive Officer Alex Martins. “They both brought die-hard dedication and an unmatched work ethic on a daily basis.”

However …

“We feel it’s time for new leadership and new voices,” added Martins. “The disappointment of getting eliminated in the first round of the playoffs these past two seasons played a primary role in our decision, as we feel our momentum towards winning a championship has paused.”

By: Mark Christopher/Sunshine Slate

Images: Orlando Magic

Orlando Magic